Difficult Day

I was not prepared for what I had to do tonight. I do not think any parent is every prepared.

The daughter of one of my employees passed away last Tuesday. She was only 15 months old. She had heart surgery about a month of ago. She did okay after the surgery for about a week, but since then she was fighting infection after infection. And she got more and more sick. Yet, our whole team believed she would make it. We prayed for her. We'd started to make an Easter basket to send to her at Strong...

But sadly, she passed early Tuesday March 18th. 2 days before she was to turn 15 months old.

And tonight was her calling hours. Seeing precious little Heaven (her name) lie there so still in her little casket broke me. Watching her 'big' sister (she's 6) go up and touch her cold little hand and cry...I just don't get it.

I know God had a purpose for little Heaven, and I know her existence touched more people than many who live to be a hundred, but I just don't understand it. It is not fair that a child so young, so perfect, so beautiful should have to have lived such a painful and short life...

As I watched her mother mourn so deeply for the child she has lost I could not help but think of my own little Lily and how precious every single minute with her is. I got to come home tonight to my little daughter. Shana will never again go home...or to the hospital...to hold her little Heaven.

I cannot write anymore...my heart is aching for little Heaven and her mommy and her big sister. I was not prepared for these emotions. No one ever is. We shouldn't have to be...not for the loss of a child.